Pilot: First Day as a BigLaw Attorney
When I came into this world, I was met with princely, untiring interest by my family and unknowingly, by myself.
My existence has been so significant, that I have spent the past few decades at the center of every single experience I have ever had. Even if what caused that experience had nothing to do with me. When I read about a person who committed suicide by jumping into an oncoming train, I think to myself, how awful!
That person died, but in my head, it’s about how I feel. As our neurons continue to fire in this conceited fashion, it’s hardly surprising that associates at BigLaw firms feel the way they do in situations that don’t merit ghastly apprehension.
Preface
I have spent quite some time thinking about the most useful content I can write on based on experiences as an attorney in high-powered New York corporate law. No doubt it is arrogant to suppose that I can (1) offer thoughtful reflections (2) that are useful (3) to intelligent BigLaw attorneys (4) in a creative or new way.
Still, an acknowledgement of arrogance—however humble it is—has never stopped anyone from doing anything. I specifically use this acknowledgement to protect my timid conscience from accusations of condescension.
It is further at once fascinating and unexceptional how long the typical BigLaw attorney allows the ascendant qualms of contemporary life consume an otherwise relatively logical intellect.
The mindset I have been so grateful to have inherited and endowed with from the frequently unfathomable mystical energies of the universe is worth drawing out in some detail. This outlook on life has saved me from many common pitfalls and agonies that most lawyers experience.
It’s as if they live in a dangerous world from which there is no escape. To extent the doomsday analogy, I have found the escape route…though there are other routes too.
I want to save any readers here from the consumption of commonly regurgitated information. So perhaps imperfectly, I intend for these words and the pages that will follow to operate based on principles as well as specific ills. However, sometimes I may focus on knotty topics (such as the exceptionally poor communication skills of partners).
Like any self-obsessed king, I believe all things I do are done at auspicious moments. And so, I dedicate this first post to newly minted juniors—many of whom start around this time of year.
The first tidbit of heavenly wisdom: every time you feel anxious, go back to your fundamentals.
Fundamentals?
The single most effective non-medical-interventionist way to address a problem in BigLaw is reflection.
It doesn’t matter if it’s a partner, client, or more senior associate causing the problem. Or if it is you.
Balance your spiritual energies: on the one hand, you made a mistake. Fine. On the other, it is never that big of a deal.
Stop yourself in the moment. Acknowledge that you are feeling that feeling. It’s going to go away in a day, if not in the next hour.
Don’t let them kill your joy of being here. Think about how long you have wanted this. Every opportunity is a moment to grow and experience the blisses of the one life you have.
Your life is the most cherished occurrence in the entirety of the world. Don’t let the bizarre propaganda of BigLaw despair generate further controversy and confusion.
Why would you let the stories of others and the insecurities that have long gnawed at your hardy conscience ruin the opportunity to make the best of what you have?
Each day is a chance to shed a little bit of the fear that all of us have been conditioned to experience.
It’s why hot girl walks are a thing now. I mean, they are just normal walks, but the way they are rationalized are as a response to modern enervation.
Call it a stride, a stroll, or a saunter. Reenergize the will to tackle the troubles that threaten to engulf you.
Maybe there are days where you cannot step away from your computer. But there are days where you can. Both types of days—the absurdly busy and the twiddling-my-thumbs-sluggish—are days when you can take a knee.
So take the knee.
To slightly reiterate, I hope to offer actionable advice through tools for reflection. The inability or refusal to set things aside and simply ponder has had devastating consequences for the rank of lawyers who have tied their sense of importance, achievement, and meaning in life to the concept of professional action. It may time to do the opposite. Perhaps we may call this the philosophy of unaction. If inaction is not taking action because of a lack of will, unaction is making a willful decision to temporarily suspend it.
And that’s a good thing.